Referral Request Scripts

𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗵𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝘁𝘂𝗻𝗲 𝟱𝟬𝟬, 𝗜 𝗴𝗼𝘁 𝟭𝟬-𝟮𝟬 𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝗿𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘀 𝗽𝗲𝗿 𝗺𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗵 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝘀𝘂𝗯𝗺𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝟭-𝟮 Sound harsh? Here's the reality from someone who gets cold outreach daily. I genuinely want to help job seekers—especially those transitioning into Trust & Safety roles. But most referral requests create work for me instead of making it easy. 😒 The Cold Messages That Get Ignored: → Subject line: "Hi!" or "Quick question" (I have no idea what you want) → No mention of the specific role or company → Generic: "Would love to connect about opportunities" → Forces me to dig through your profile to understand your background The Messages That Get Immediate Action: → Subject line: "Referral Request - Trust & Safety PM at Meta (Job ID: 12345)" → Clear ask in the first sentence → Pre-written referral blurb I can copy-paste → All details included upfront 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘌𝘹𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘦𝘥: Subject: "Referral Request - Senior Policy Specialist [Location] at Airbnb" "Hi Ruby, I applied for Senior Policy Specialist (Job ID: 67890) at Airbnb and would appreciate a referral. Here's a pre-written blurb you can use: I bring 3 years of content policy experience at fintech startups, having developed community guidelines affecting 50K+ daily transactions with expertise in regulatory compliance.' Attached: SarahJones_PolicySpecialist_SF.pdf Thanks for considering!" The Details That Matter: → Clear subject line with role and company → Specific job ID and location → How we're connected (even if it's just LinkedIn) → Why you're qualified in 1-2 sentences → Properly named resume file Bottom Line: I receive 5-10 cold messages daily. The ones that respect my time get responses. The ones that create work get deleted. Make your referral request a 30-second scan, not a detective mission. ♻️ Share to your friends or network who are looking for jobs.

If referrals are part of your job search strategy, please read this. Delete “I need a job” from your lingo. 1. It’s too vague 2. As a recipient, it feels like homework 3. It sounds transactional Even if your contact wants to help, they probably don’t have time to figure out what you’d be a good fit for. So, to avoid burning out good leads, I would advise you to only ask for a referral when you can articulate: >What title(s) are you looking for? >What industry do you want to join? >What’s your preferred setup (WFH, hybrid, in-person)? >What type of company are you looking to join (startup, F50, etc)? >What’s your non-negotiable benefit (minimum salary, minimum # of vacation days…)? A good ask sounds like this: “Hi! [Catch up]. I’m looking for an Account Manager role in Healthcare, preferably at [company name]. I prefer a WFH role, but I could go for a hybrid if it’s in [area]. I have 5 years of experience handling enterprise accounts and [more context here]. Do you know anyone who might be looking for someone with my experience?” Or if you know someone whose manager is hiring, a good ask might sound like this: “Hi! [Catch up]. I saw your team is looking for a [title] and I was wondering if you could put in a good word for me? I have 6 years of experience in [industry] and I have achieved [list here] so far.” If you ask like this, you increase your chances of success because the receiver won’t ask themselves, “What does this person do again?” and you’ll prove that you’ve already done your homework before reaching out, without putting the burden of research on them.

Here's how to land a referral (without being a weirdo) 👇 Most people don't know how to approach asking for a referral. They reach out and ask for a favor making the whole thing feel transactional. That’s why they get ignored. If you want someone to refer you, focus on building a real connection first. Here’s how: Step 1: Give First (And Make It About Them) → People are happy to help when they feel valued—not used. → Instead of immediately asking for something, start by showing real interest in their journey. You could say something like: “Hey [Name], this might be a bit random, but I saw you work at [Company] and I’m exploring roles there! I figured you’d have better insights than Google. Would love to connect!" ✔ Recognizes their experience without being over the top ✔ Frames them as a trusted source of insight Step 2: Follow Up When Connected. Ask Something Meaningful (That’s Easy to Answer) → Instead of jumping into “Can I get a referral?” start with something genuine and thoughtful. → Make it a question that’s easy for them to respond to. Example Follow-Up: “Appreciate the connect! Quick question—what’s something about working at [Company] that most people don’t realize until they’re inside? Figured you’d have a great take.” ✔ Shows curiosity and respect for their experience ✔ Gives them a chance to share something valuable ✔ Builds rapport without asking for anything This step alone sets you apart. Most people only reach out when they need something—you’re creating an actual conversation. Step 3: Ask For a Call and Let the Referral Happen Naturally "If you have a few minutes to chat, I’d love to buy you a virtual coffee. No pressure—would love to learn from your experience!" → People refer others when they feel connected—not when they’re pressured. → Toward the end, steer the conversation naturally: “This has been so helpful! I’ve been exploring [specific role]—based on what you’ve seen, does my background make sense for it?” ✔ Not a favor—just an opinion ✔ Helps them visualize how you fit into the company If they say YES, follow up with: “That makes a ton of sense. If you were me, how would you get on [Company]’s radar for this role?” ✔ Now they’re thinking about how to get you noticed ✔ This often leads them to mention a hiring manager, referral process, or even offer to refer you If they don’t mention a referral, then you can finally ask in a low-pressure way: “This conversation has been amazing—would you feel comfortable referring me to anyone at the company who may be able to connect me to the hiring manager?" Step 4: Keep the Relationship Alive → Even if they don’t refer you now, they might later. ✔ Send a quick thank you for their time ✔ If another opportunity pops up, it’s easy to reconnect Remember, people refer those they respect and want to support—or simply someone who makes them look good to the hiring manager! The key is to build real relationships and give first.

The proper way to ask for referrals is the way where you do 95% of the work for the person you're asking to go to bat for you. Here's an example - with scripting - that's worked for me since the Nixon administration: Step 1 - Ask for permission: "Hey Keith! Noticed on the ol' LinkedIn that you were connected to Dan Wardle over at Noibu. Do you happen to know him well? Taking a look at his company, I'm confident we'd be able to add as much value to his team as we have been to Bullhorn over the past few years. If I wrote a separate email that includes a bit of context as to why I'd like to meet him, would you feel comfortable forwarding it along to him and seeing if he's open to an introduction? That way, if he's not interested, he can decline to take the intro, and you haven't really used any social capital on your end. All you did is forward along something from me. 🙂 What do you think?" Once Keith agrees to make himself useful, comes the next step... Step 2 - Writing a forwardable "opt-in" email: SUB: Intro to Dan at Noibu? "Hey Keith - how'd the month end up for your team? Noticed you're connected to Dan on LinkedIn - do you happen to know him well enough to feel comfortable making an introduction? I saw they added some BDRs and AEs to the team over the past few months. Given how much your GTM team has been engaged with and loved Sales Assembly over the past few years, I was hoping he'd be interested exploring how we could possibly be supportive to him and his team as well! If he's not interested in that, I'd still invite him to join our monthly Executive Revenue Leader Peer Group, so that he can jam with a room full of 30-50 of his VP and C-level peers every month.  We'd love to have him there as our guest. If you don't know him that well or just aren't comfortable, all good. Just figured I'd float this by you. Thanks!" What happens next? Keith forwards that to Dan. Now, is it possible that when he forwards that to Dan, he simply says "See below - interested?" Sure, I guess so. What's more likely? He forwards that to Dan and says: "Hey Dan, see below. Not sure if you've heard of Sales Assembly, but they've been an amazing partner to us at Bullhorn over the past few years. No obligation to take the intro, of course, but I think at the very least it would be worth connecting with Matt." Back to the original point about doing 95% of the work for your advocate, what did I ask Keith to do? Nothing. Just click forward on an email. I didn't ask him who he knows that might be interested. I did the work for him. I didn't ask him to look through his connections. I did the work for him. I didn't even ask him to endorse us. I just presumed he would anyway. And they usually do. This works when you're trying to meet prospects. This works when you're trying to get a new job. Do 95% of the work. Ask your advocates to simply slick FWD. Make it easy for people to refer you, and they'll refer you.

“Hi, can you refer me for the XYZ role?” This doesn’t work at the Principal Product Manager or Director level. And this is why you’re not getting referrals. At the senior level, referrals aren’t favors; they’re reputational bets. When someone refers you internally, they’re attaching their credibility to yours. If they barely know what you do or why you’re a fit, it’s a risk they won’t take. I see this all the time with talented product managers: They treat referrals like a volume game, sending 10 generic messages in the hope that one sticks. But referrals don’t work on scale; they work on clarity and trust. Here’s how you should actually ask for referrals. 1. Give clarity, not just the link Don’t just share the role, share your fit. “I noticed the Senior PM role on the Payments team. My last two roles focused on scaling transactional systems and improving checkout conversion. I’d love your take on whether it aligns.” This shows you’ve done the homework and you respect their time. 2. Make it easy to say Yes Write the message they can forward. Attach your resume, add 2–3 bullets of measurable impact, and close the loop. Referrers don’t have time to “figure out your story.” That’s your job. 3. Build trust before you ask The best referrals don’t come from cold DMs; they come from warm awareness. Comment on their insights, share your perspective, or connect months before you need the ask. Referrals happen naturally when people already see your credibility. 4. Follow up with professionalism If they don’t respond, don’t chase. Most people want to help, but can’t always prioritize it. Your follow-up should sound like a professional, not a ping. “Hey [Name], just checking in - no worries if it’s not the right time. Appreciate your consideration either way.” Senior-level referrals come to those who make it safe to refer them. That’s what “referrable” really means - clear, credible, and easy to trust. Are you sending dozens of messages with no results? It’s not your resume - it’s your approach. -> If this helped you rethink how to approach referrals, save this post for the next time you reach out. -> Follow me for practical career strategies that help product managers land $300k-$900k roles.

🔥 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐎 𝐀𝐒𝐊 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐅𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 — 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭. After my last post, 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞: “𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈 𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞?” Here’s the complete breakdown — what works, and what doesn’t. 🚀 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐏 𝟏: 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐍 = 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍 Before replying, people 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋 check your profile. Make it count. ✅ 𝐇𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐬 (languages, tools, domains) ✅ 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 (projects, certifications, posts) ✅ 𝐀𝐝𝐝 𝐚 𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐧, 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐨 👶 𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫? 𝐍𝐨 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦. Your strength is in your 𝐡𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐞: — Share your 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐣𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐲 — Build and post 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐣𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 — Show up with 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲 🧠 𝐋𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐞 > 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞. 🌐 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐏 𝟐: 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊 Referrals don’t happen overnight. If you message 20 people and 1 replies — 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚 𝐰𝐢𝐧. 💡 𝐏𝐫𝐨 𝐭𝐢𝐩: — Connect with people who 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐣𝐨𝐛𝐬 (they're active) — Join 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐮𝐩𝐬, webinars, communities — 𝐀𝐝𝐝 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐬𝐤 💬 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐏 𝟑: 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐀 𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊𝐒 Stop sending: “Can you refer me?” ❌ Send this instead ✅: Hi [Name], I’m applying to [Company] for [Job Title]. I know we don’t know each other personally, and I completely understand if you can’t refer me. Just wanted to share my resume and job link below in case you’re open to it. Either way, thank you for being part of my network! 📎 Include everything in 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭: ✅ 𝐉𝐨𝐛 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐤 ✅ 𝐑𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐞 (Google Drive link, view-only) ✅ 𝐁𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐟 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 ⏰ 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐏 𝟒: 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝗪 𝐔𝐏 𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄 If they don’t reply: ✅ Send 𝐨𝐧𝐞 friendly reminder ❌ Don’t spam ❌ Don’t guilt-trip They might be busy or unable to refer at the moment. 💎 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐑𝐔𝐋𝐄: 𝐁𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐉𝐎𝐁 You know how tough this journey is. So when it’s your turn: — Help others — Give back — 𝐁𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐑𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐮𝐩, 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭. You’ve got this. Let’s win together. 💪🔥

Over the last 6 months at Google, I have referred 60+ people. More than 20 of them got interview calls, and 1 has been selected so far! 🎉 Referring someone takes less than a minute—if all the necessary details are in place. However, I often receive messages like, “I’m looking for internships” or “Are there any openings?” Here’s a tip: Always check the company’s careers portal first. It has the most up-to-date list of openings and helps streamline the process. To make your referral request effective, here are 3 key things I look for: 1️⃣ Resume Link: Share a link to your resume not a PDF. This ensures easy access and reference. 2️⃣ Job Link: Provide the specific job posting link you’re applying for. It avoids confusion and keeps things clear. 3️⃣ Fit for the Role: Write why you're the best fit for the role. For example: "Sai has over 2 years of experience in software development with expertise in building scalable distributed systems." Additionally, one common mistake I see is applying for roles you aren’t eligible for (especially among college students). This doesn’t help anyone. Please review the job requirements carefully before applying. A well-structured referral request not only saves time but also significantly increases your chances of success. Put in the effort, and opportunities will follow. 🚀 Let’s make this process smoother for everyone! #Google #Referral #JobSearchTips #CareerAdvice

95% of the cold messages I receive asking for a referral to Asana are pretty bad. Here’s how to do it well: Be brief, specific, and valuable. 🕦 Be brief: People have limited time and attention. Don’t send them a lengthy message about your background. 🎯 Be specific: Don’t use vague asks like “Would you consider me?”. Be concrete about what you need: a short call to discuss a specific position. 💰Be valuable: The person on the other side needs to hire someone, fast. Show that you are perfect for the role with zero effort from them. Focus on them instead of yourself. You’ll do 100x better than the majority of applicants.