Valentine
by SHAUN USHER, Daily Mail
Think Scream Goes to Elm Street on Friday The 13th, and you'll get the drift of Australian director James Blanks's farrago of horror cliches.
They're all here, from the masked maniac to that squeegee music, using sinister, shrilling strings to evoke a rubber blade on a wet windowpane.
Starring talented, though misused, Jessica Capshaw and a squad of as-seen-on-TV (but not much over here) faces such as David Boreanaz from Angel, this is a horror film in every sense of the word.
High School girls humiliate the class nerd and more than a decade later he may or may not be killing them one by one, while wearing a Cupid mask.
The whole thing's so transparently silly and rigged that suspense is far outweighed by irritation.
Click below for more reviews of this film
Most watched News videos
- New video shows Epstein laughing and chasing young women
- British Airways passengers turn flight into a church service
- Epstein describes himself as a 'tier one' sexual predator
- Skier dressed as Chewbacca brutally beaten in mass brawl
- Two schoolboys plummet out the window of a moving bus
- Holly Valance is shut down by GB News for using slur
- Police dog catches bag thief who pushed woman to the floor
- Melinda Gates says Bill Gates must answer questions about Epstein
- JD Vance turns up heat on Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor
- Buddhist monks in Thailand caught with a stash of porn
- China unveils 'Star Wars' warship that can deploy unmanned jets
- Trump slams Kaitlan Collins for lack of smiling over Epstein grilling
