Dog Eat Dog

Another Weakest Link-style Darwinist Nazi quiz show, except that Ulrika Jonsson is not Anne Robinson, and the fact that she is dressed in tight black leather is not intimidating in a dominatrix way, but very media, dahling.

The contestants - the usual bunch of gym-crazed accountants you get on The Crystal Maze - are given challenges and nominate who they think is least likely to succeed, hoping that the selected candidate will fail and be eliminated from the game.

As with everything in these cowardly versions of the blood-letting sports of yore, the language is more powerful than the actuality. 'Eliminated' means go home on the Tube.

Perhaps if all the contestants and presenters of Robot Wars, Dog Eat Dog and Fort Boyard were placed in a ring with some ferocious wild animals, all the world's problems would be solved. It would at least make better TV.

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