18 April 2008 Sitemap Archive

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  Friday 18 April 2008  

• Taxpayers would bare the brunt of free care for pensioners
• As usual, it's us who'll pay the price
• Jamie Murray and partner Kevin Ullyett book final berth in Estoril Open
• Screening women in their 70s could cut cancer deaths by a third, say experts
• Supermarket stampede as women slap £2.49 baby 'bottom butter' on their faces
• Connacht beat Newport Gwent Dragons to keep Heineken Cup hopes alive
• Gwyneth looked like Rumpole and she behaved like him as well
• Murrayfield misery for Lienster as Edinburgh gun them down
• Glasgow stun Llanelli with come-from-behind victory
• On-loan teenager Carlos Vela seeks return to Arsenal front line
• Trouble for Brown as Labour backbenchers threaten grammar school revolt
• Rio Ferdinand can learn from Maldini and continue to play until he's 40, says Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson
• Colin Montgomerie to tie the knot today for the second time - at a golf club, of course
• Defiant Gordon Brown flies home to face down Labour backbenchers' 10p tax revolt
• Chilling march of the box-ticking robots
• Leeds coach Brian McClennan gracious in victory
• Calzaghe and Hopkins exchange war of words at weigh-in
• Brown is given the Kennedys' seal of approval
• Deranged attacks. And why this week has actually been rather good for Gordon Brown
• Ryan Rhodes knocks out Gary Woolcombe to reclaim the British light-middleweight title
• Sporting birthdays - April 19
• Sport on TV - April 19
• On this day in sport - April 19
• Ministers are hiding the true cost of the Olympic Games, says Commons watchdog (and it's likely to be £9.3bn)
• Mother's heartbreak: How 30 blunders by hospital killed my newborn baby
• Guantanamo eight to sue MI5 and MI6 over 'illegal abduction and interrogation'
• You are the weakest lip: Anne Robinson shows off her new trout pout
• Fit enough to play basketball ... the Iraqi boy paid £2m by the MoD for being paralysed by a stray British bullet
• A GCSE in Jade: How foul-mouthed Goody has made it onto the national curriculum
• One in three men and women of working age have no pension savings, report reveals
• Sports quiz - April 19
• Petrol prices set to rise as crude oil hits a new record high
• The last feudal baron: New laws to bring the island of Sark into the 21st century
• The Xbox generation: Why children are now more likely to be hurt falling out of bed than from a tree
• An innocent boy and the ugly face of PC zealotry
• Watchdog sounds alarm over the superbugs which are being passed to humans through food
• Crusaders unable to meet Challenge as Leeds kids deliver knock-out punch
• The death of common sense - it's time we all fought back
• Ruud van Nistelrooy ready to quit Real Madrid for AC MIlan in a £6m summer move
• Is the Britain's Got Talent choirboy REALLY a bullied kid from a sink estate? His mother admits: 'The pudding may have been over-egged'
• Gareth Barry gives Aston Villa manager Martin O'Neill an ultimatum
• Madeleine: Stephen Lawrence's father Neville fears the McCanns' marriage could breakdown
• Elegy for Britain's vanishing village way of life
• Leeds left waiting to know if 15-point penalty will be overturned
• Portsmouth joined in the race for long-term target Jonas Gutierrez
• I'm only human, says Johnson, the new master of Twickenham as he starts quest to turn England into world beaters
• Birmingham's Stephen Kelly explains why he is the only Premier League player still standing
• Shirley Temple: the superstar who had her childhood destroyed by Hollywood
• Marcus Hahnemann - Second Season Syndrome: Rumours I'm off are senseless in Seattle
• SPORTSMAIL EXCLUSIVE: Redknapp 'very unlikely' to face charges after arrest over illegal payments, reveal prosecution sources
• Peaches Geldolf accused of leaving boutique with £500 dress without paying
• McCullum puts gravy train on the fast track as Indian Premier League delivers everything it promised
• Revealed: The taxpayers' £300m bill for claimants who are fit to work
• Great expectation, but dealing with the pressure is part of my job, says Martin Johnson
• Soccer star and the gangsters: Steven Gerrard and the murky depths of Liverpool's underworld
• Grim for Grant as Blues manager loses the plot after lack of backing from Chelsea hierarchy
• The 1688 invasion of Britain that's been erased from history
• Crucible's marathon men battle for £250,000 glory at snooker's World Championships
• Streetwise Joe Calzaghe must outsmart The Executioner Bernard Hopkins
• Ambitious Barry warns Villa to spend big or he will be on his bike
• Fulham's Stalteri claims the belief is back as Cottagers grapple with battle to avoid the drop
• Benitez puts fans first as battle off the pitch at Anfield continues to rage
• Turner's Earners - Halcon's ready for National service
• Wenger threatens to take captaincy off Arsenal's last of the Mohicans and king of sulks Gallas
• Tony Curtis on Marilyn Monroe: It was like kissing Hitler!
• Rod Stewart: Three wives, seven children and my beloved train set - why it's such fun being me!
• Released sex offender repeatedly raped woman during 13-hour siege after she tried to sell him a painting
• Canny Ferguson gives bamboozled Grant a lesson in how to rally the troops
• Muthabara steps out for a Classic warm-up
• Hard road to the flip side of Sunderland striker Kenwyne Jones
• GRAHAM POLL'S OFFICIAL LINE: Why divers deserve to be hit with the 'cheat' tag
• Shannon: Mother's ex, Craig Meehan, arrested for first time over alleged abduction plot
• Final lap in a wacky race to reach the Barclays Premier League
• Samba, the latest daddy of Ewood Park weighs in on Ronaldo and lets out the secret of his nickname King Kong
• Johnson's not one to stand on ceremony
• Move over Boris ... I'm your new mare
• £5m garden sale: The pricetag for Leonardslee sounds blooming expensive
• New fiction
• Nice bit of skirt
• Return of the Ood: Alien shock in store for Doctor Who's assistant Donna
• In search of love in a cold climate
• Don't put all the pressure on Little, says Reading boss Coppell
• Introducing the most 'seductive woman' of all time: A blend of Kelly, Angelina, J.Lo and Halle
• Melinda Messenger puts on a brave face but leaves her wedding ring behind for TV appearance
• Fashion news
• Gray's anatomy
• It's insulting to talk to me about getting the sack, fumes Fulham boss Hodgson
• Supermodel Gisele gets racy in latest wrist-watch fashion shoot
• City boss Sven set for crunch talks with Thaksin as agent defends Swede
• It's insulting to talk to me about getting the sack, fumes Fulham boss Hodgson
• McLeish reckons Birmingham derby with Aston Villa will live up to Old Firm
• His mistress must think she's won the lottery
• What book?
• Tourists can hire car from just £8 per day
• How can my wife ease her leg cramps?
• Paperbacks
• Rotherham FC deny reports they are about to go bust if a buyer is not found
• Labour MP charged with criminal damage after 'he clambered over van's bonnet to board a waiting bus'
• Why has my child got a cold all year round?
• Hot chicks with some cool tracks
• Boy, 5, who sucked on discarded drug needle faces wait for HIV test results
• Chelsea blunder has put us well on course for title, says United boss Ferguson
• Melinda Messenger puts on a brave face but leaves her wedding ring behind for TV appearance
• Hollyoaks horror as troubled teen Sasha overdoses on heroin
• Bloodstained items found in Jersey 'house of horrors' children's home
• City news in brief: Eurofighter, SocGen
• Chelsea line up double raid for Napoli starlets Hamsik and Varriale
• Shepherd's delight: The perfect jacket potato
• England's greatest and the wife he 'killed'
• Warnock should look at himself before blaming Liverpool for Sheffield United's relegation, fumes Benitez
• Bloodstained items discovered in a former children's home in Jersey
• Banned for life: Rail firm's crackdown on passengers who put feet on seats
• 'Pack of hyenas' smirk as they are jailed for kicking burglary victim to death
• Shepherd's delight: Bolognese sauce
• More ministers' aides join tax revolt
• Honour at last for the VC hero of India buried in a pauper's grave
• Chelsea blunder has put us well on course for title, says United boss Ferguson
• Barcelona can knock out Manchester United out of Champions League if they stop Ronaldo, claims Liverpool striker Torres
• Beware of Butt, Keane warns his Sunderland players ahead of derby
• Roll-up: Pamela Anderson spends the day on a merry-go-round to promote new show
• Gay Heathrow guard 'wins £30,000' after colleague wobbles breasts at him
• Piers Morgan is called a 'disgusting little creep'
• As though cigarettes weren't bad enough, the fake ones are 'full of rat droppings and lethal chemicals'
• Manchester City v PORTSMOUTH: Injuries clear for Pompey boss Redknapp
• 'Sex and drugs' blackmail plot royal: 'Do whatever it takes to protect my family'
• Benitez shrugs off Anfield civil war to claim: I'm really happy at Liverpool
• Keegan convinced Owen will sign new Newcastle deal
• JANE CLARKE: Coffee will make your hernia ache
• Do you talk Nerdic? Geek speak is the fastest-growing language in Europe
• British village terrified by giant eagle owl that swoops on children and small animals
• Warnock should look at himself before blaming Liverpool for Sheffield United's relegation, fumes Benitez
• Jade Goody goes home with on-off boyfriend Jack Tweed after mass brawl in Essex club
• Curbishley sympathises with grumpy Grant but says criticism is part of a manager's life
• Blackburn v MANCHESTER UNITED: Vidic and Nani back for Reds
• Travel pictures of the week
• Alex McLeish reckons Birmingham derby with Aston Villa will live up to past Old Firm clashes in Scotland with Martin O'Neill
• Want to be a rock star? You can now be one in your own living room
• Muslim fanatic who heckled John Reid jailed for 4 and a half years for inciting terrorism
• Leeds' 15-point deduction appeal will be decided before end of season
• Banned for life: Rail firm's crackdown on passengers who put feet on seats
• Greek romance wins the inaugural Daily Mail First Novel prize
• James Martin crosses Europe in 'the most beautiful Jaguar ever'
• Traffic warden gets a soaking from an angry fishmonger with bucket full of stinking water
• Bullish Ferguson expects to see United take a major step towards the title at Blackburn
• Benitez shrugs off Anfield civil war to claim: I'm really happy at Liverpool
• Tom Parker Bowles with the top beer: Best served chillied
• Decorated Iraq veteran denied council house because he's been away too long
• Gang smile in court as they are jailed for killing homeowner who caught them burgling
• FULHAM v Liverpool: Niemi to return in goal for Cottagers
• Manchester United won't blow the Premier League title now, says Blackburn Rovers boss Mark Hughes
• Lisa Snowdon's life through a lens
• Last week was worst ever, admits Arsenal manager Wenger as he vows to get the Gunners firing again
• U.S. war vets' fury after Time magazine replaces Iwo Jima flag with a TREE
• Middlesbrough v BOLTON: Striker Davies missing for Trotters
• Shepherd's delight: Shepherd's pie
• You can't have a council home if you've been away, soldier decorated for service in Iraq is told
• British village terrified by giant eagle owl that swoops on children and small animals
• Cutbacks in the capital
• Milan close in on Van Nistelrooy leaving Real to target Drogba
• Oklahoma sheriff 'used women in his county jail as sex slaves'
• Good Morning Afghanistan: From runnning the Gareth Gates fan club to the firing-line
• Ewe are one in a million: Sheep gives birth to FIVE lambs
• Roll-up, roll-up: Pamela Anderson send her fans into a spin with a sexy ride on a fairground carousel
• Arsenal boss Wenger 'honoured' by Valencia striker David Villa's come-and-get-me plea
• REVEALED: Avram Grant finally gives his thoughts on Chelsea's victory over Everton
• Hypnotist snubs anaesthetic and sends himself into trance for operation
• Oklahoma sheriff 'used women in his county jail as sex slaves'
• The hypnotist who snubbed an anaesthetic and sent himself into trance for painful bone-cutting surgery
• Introducing the most 'seductive woman' of all time: A blend of Kelly, Angelina, J.Lo and Halle
• That was the Sporting Week: Cross Cris Ronaldo and his jug of Pimm's, and is Ian Wright the next Alec Gilroy?
• Britain's Got Talent: The bizarre Britney wannabe who had Simon Cowell lunging for all three buzzers
• Abramovich sued for billions in bitter 'fraud and blackmail' battle with ex-business partner
• Gay Heathrow security guard wins £30,000 sex case after colleague wobbled her breasts at him
• Give yourself a green-food energy boost
• Large deficit dents Darling's plans
• The football mascot cards from the 1930s that would now fall foul of the PC brigade
• Last week was worst ever, admits Arsenal manager Wenger as he vows to get the Gunners firing again
• War veteran fury as Time magazine replaces flag in famous Iwo Jima photograph with tree for global warming story
• Leeds' 15-point deduction appeal will be decided before end of season
• Electric devices left on in your bedroom could be the reason why you can't get a good night's sleep
• MANCHESTER CITY v Portsmouth: Too soon for City defender Richards
• London house sellers face the crunch
• NEWCASTLE v Sunderland: Same yet again for Keegan
• Job cuts expected after Citi losses
• Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich sued for billions in bitter 'fraud and blackmail' battle with former business partner
• Michelle Monaghan: The new romcom queen
• Blackburn v MANCHESTER UNITED: Vidic and Nani back for Reds
• Fulham v LIVERPOOL: Benitez likely to rest key duo
• UK Coal to consider re-opening deep mine in Nottinghamshire
• Amy Winehouse snubs jailed Blake's birthday and is living like 'a single woman'
• Chelsea's hopes of signing Brazil star Kaka boosted by Milan's Ronaldinho bid
• Chelsea must win a trophy for this season to be a success, says Carvalho
• Beware of my ex-Manchester United team-mate Nicky Butt, Sunderland boss Keane tells his players ahead of Newcastle derby
• Dud look: Make-up free Penny Smith a dead ringer for Dudley Moore
• Chelsea must win a trophy for season to be a success, insists Carvalho
• Britain's Got Talent: The bizarre Britney wannabe that had Simon Cowell lunging for all three buzzers
• RUGBY UNION: England boss Johnson thrilled to be back but sorry for Ashton
• Watching Manchester United play is driving me 'mental', says knee-injury victim Darren Fletcher
• Mother gives birth to one-in-500,000 quadruplets, including three identical boys
• Hollyoaks horror as troubled teen Sasha overdoses on heroin
• Democrat chairman urges early decision over Obama and Clinton after McCain poll surge
• How to lick an obsession
• United boosted as Ferdinand, Carrick and Brown sign new Old Trafford deals
• Jane Clarke answers your questions
• Portsmouth will have to pay £12m for Porto striker Lopez
• Defender Philippe Senderos will bounce back from setbacks at Arsenal against Reading, insists Senderos Snr
• Homework for primary school children is complete waste of time, study shows
• Cotton claims Andrew didn't want Johnson as new England manager
• Heights of fashion: The seven inch heels that aren't made for walking
• We have lift off: The quickest yacht in the world
• Company considers re-opening mine in Nottinghamshire as price of coal doubles in year
• Five-year-old boy who sucked on discarded hypodermic needle faces tests for HIV and hepatitis
• 10,000-year-old spruce in Sweden is world's oldest tree
• Families opt for holidays at home
• Moyes targets UEFA Cup place after Champions League hopes disappear
• Title-chasing United boosted as Ferdinand, Carrick and Brown all sign new Old Trafford deals
• Matthew Horne: Are you having a laugh?
• Be our winning novelist
• Forssell hails McLeish's 'fighting spirit' as Birmingham prepare for derby clash with Villa
• Q&A: The 10p tax rate fiasco
• Homework for primary schoolchildren 'is complete waste of time', claims study
• Shaun Wright-Phillips is determined to prove his worth to Avram Grant before heading for the exit door at Chelsea
• Pricey rice hits East and West
• Jane Clarke answers your questions
• Polygamist 'underage sex cult' case descends into farce as judge struggles to control lawyers and parents
• Spurs boss Ramos: I know who I want to keep on at the Lane this summer
• Arsenal paid Henry £10m for 17 League performances, claims Gunners Trust
• Dylan Jones: Posh and white? We don't need your sort
• Homework for primary school children is complete waste of time, study shows
• FBI may probe funds and banks
• Fanatical stamp collector steals £70,000 from churches to keep up three-tonne collection
• Der Stink: Germany to blame for terrible smell engulfing England blown in by freak weather
• New England boss Johnson thrilled to be back but sorry for Ashton
• Das Stink: England engulfed by terrible smell as freak weather blows in French stench
• Google profits leap lifts shares
• I hope Liverpool never win another trophy under Benitez, fumes ex-Blades boss Warnock as Rafa looks set to repeat history
• Dud look: Make-up free Penny Smith a dead ringer for Dudley Moore
• Parents beaten after saving son from hoodie gang attack in takeaway
• Benitez to shuffle his squad as he plots league victory at Fulham and Euro glory against Chelsea
• THAT WAS THE SPORTING WEEK: Cross Cris Ronaldo and his jug of Pimms <br />IS Ian Wright the next Alec Gilroy?<br />AND Spurs defender Woodgate's continued search for an affordable London home
• We've got our confidence back now, says upbeat Newcastle boss Keegan
• Google profits surge by 30% despite fears of slump in online advertising
• Bangkok braced for Olympic torch protests ... and Buddhist temple boycotts Japan relay
• Passengers warned of 'T5 summer of hell' as holiday traffic predicted to send baggage system into meltdown
• Arsenal paid Henry £10m for just 17 league performances, claims Gunners Supporters Trust
• Calzaghe Senior fears Hopkins will get down and dirty in a desperate attempt to beat Joe
• Amy Winehouse snubs jailed Blake's birthday and is living like 'a single woman'
• Defender Leigh Bromby favours Crystal Palace's Neil Warnock and Watford's Aidy Boothroyd's direct styles
• 'My special little lady': Big Brother's Craig's tribute to Down's Syndrome sufferer friend
• How exercise can keep you young
• Pete Doherty is moved to secure unit as fellow prisoners plot to beat him up
• West Ham ready to show Ljungberg, Neill and Dyer the door as Curbishley is ordered to slash club's wage bill
• Passengers warned of 'T5 summer of hell' as holiday traffic predicted to send baggage system into meltdown
• Card cloner cashes in at ATM
• 'Why mummy needs plastic surgery': The controversial book explaining nip and tuck to children
• Google profits surge by 30 per cent despite fears of slump in online advertising
• Why Tina Hobley is terrified of hospitals
• Mother gives birth to one-in-500,000 quadruplets, including three identical boys
• THE BIG MATCH: Fulham v Liverpool
• Moyes targets UEFA Cup place after Champions League hopes finally disappear
• Why designer Phillip Lim is the new star of planet fashion
• Has Chanelle got talent? Racy Posh clone launches her new single in fishnets and a corset (as 'sex tape' is conveniently released)
• Means tests for pensioners paying for residential care are 'cruel', claims David Cameron
• City boss Sven set for crunch talks as Thaksin is urged to be cautious
• Congestion charge has not cut jams, admits London transport chief
• Iraq war wounded could use stem cells to regrow lost limbs, say Pentagon scientists
• I'm not quite ready to sign a new United contract yet, reveals Rio Ferdinand
• West Ham v DERBY: Rams pair back in contention
• Families opt for summer holidays at home as credit crunch hits foreign travel
• Sven eager to see job through despite chairman Thaksin's disappointment with City slump
• Crunch hits Haynes as US car sales start to fall
• Fanatical stamp collector steals £70,000 from churches to keep up three-tonne collection
• Binge Britain: Parents beaten by drunken teenage gang after coming to rescue of son cornered in takeaway
• West Ham v DERBY: Same again for Jewell
• We've got our confidence back now watch us go, says upbeat Newcastle boss Keegan
• Aston Villa v BIRMINGHAM: McLeish to leave it late
• I'm not quite ready to sign a new contract at Manchester United yet, reveals defender Rio Ferdinand
• 'My special little lady': Big Brother's Craig pays tribute to Down's Syndrome sufferer
• Oops I did it again: Britney picks up a K-Fed lookalike
• Cheerleader or Commando: What type of parent are you?
• Means tests for pensioners paying for residential care are 'cruel', claims David Cameron
• Iraq war wounded could use stem cells to regrow lost limbs, say Pentagon scientists
• Pete Doherty is moved to secure unit as fellow prisoners plot to beat him up
• Spanish 'Calendar Girls' left with debt and 5,000 unwanted copies after poor sales
• WIGAN v Tottenham: Hagen missing with illness for Latics
• Navy personnel seized in Gulf were not in disputed territory, defence chiefs insist
• 'Why mummy needs plastic surgery': The controversial book explaining nip and tuck to children
• ASTON VILLA v Birmingham: Gardner return a boost for O'Neill
• Revealed: The world's oldest tree that took root 10,000 years ago
• WIGAN v Tottenham: Ill Hagen missing for Latics
• Cashpoint thief plunders £10,000 in just two hours using 49 cloned credit cards
• Analysis: Airlines in fuel cost crisis
• Buy less, live more: The stylish way to Survive the credit crunch
• It wasn't a walk in the park for us as Liverpool were out for three points, insists Fulham's Clint Dempsey
• ASTON VILLA v Birmingham: Gardner return a boost for O'Neill
• Aston Villa v BIRMINGHAM: McLeish to leave it late
• Sexy schoolgirl Geri Halliwell gets top marks for hilarity with her Friday Night Project
• Punch leaves M&amp;B high and dry
• Subprime flop scraps loans to target debt
• Help, I'm not dead! Paralysed man manages to signal to family that he's alive after doctors declare him dead
• Banks have to prove their case
• Ballack, Essien and Lampard could all miss Chelsea's date with Liverpool
• Disabled man gets Asbo after bombarding council with 10,000 calls in just FOUR months
• Liz Jones's Diary: In which I discover that my ex has learnt nothing
• I hope Liverpool never win another trophy under Benitez, fumes ex-Blades boss Warnock as Rafa looks set to field another understrength side
• Simon Jordan's pep-talk helped me turn Crystal Palace into play-off hopefuls, claims manager Neil Warnock
• Pit reopens as coal prices soar
• Spanish 'Calendar Girls' left with debt and 5,000 unwanted copies after poor sales
• Mortgage squeeze sees lending slump 17%
• CCTV shows the cashpoint thief who plundered £10,000 in just two hours using 49 cloned credit cards
• Cameron: Every household pays £4,000 more council tax under Labour
• Has Chanelle got talent? Racy Posh clone launches her new single in fishnets and a corset (as 'sex tape' is conveniently released)
• Spurs boss Ramos: I know who I want to keep at the Lane this summer
• &pound;500m wiped from Thomson Reuters
• Johnson's England reign must start with a bang not a whimper in New Zealand, says Quins boss Richards
• Congestion charge has not cut jams, admits TfL chief
• We've to win at QPR to stand any chance of reaching play-offs, it's as simple as that, says Charlton manager Alan Pardew
• WEST HAM v Derby: Trio in contention for Hammers
• Bangkok braced for Olympic torch protests ... and Buddhist temple boycotts Japan relay
• Prozac might cure 'lazy eye' say scientists
• Travellers told 'stay away from Zimbabwe'
• Disabled man hit with ASBO after bombarding council with 10,000 calls in just four months
• Rival bidder emerges in Expro takeover
• Newcastle v SUNDERLAND: Etuhu to miss derby clash
• Victory over Everton was a result to celebrate but is overshadowed by Chelsea boss Avram's post-match sulk
• Do you talk Nerdic? Geek speak is the fastest-growing language in Europe
• MIDDLESBROUGH v Bolton: Southgate hit by O'Neil blow
• How Geri Halliwell created a new Spice Girl
• More credit crunch pain yet, says BoE
• Families opt for summer holidays at home as credit crunch hits foreign travel
• Wigan v TOTTENHAM: Spurs likley to be without Chimbonda
• WEST HAM v Derby: Trio in contention for Hammers
• Pope to address U.N. after celebrating mass with 45,000 in packed baseball stadium
• Arsenal boss Wenger will settle for second best in the Premier League this season
• Bid rigging
• ARSENAL v Reading: Gunners waiting on keeper Almunia
• You'll get no favours from us, Blackburn striker Roque Santa Cruz tells title-chasing Manchester United
• Pound's new level to hit living standards
• Almunia's quick recovery set to add to Arsenal rival Lehmann's woes
• City focus: Alderman faces battle over BAE
• A round-up of the newspapers: Friday
• Arsenal v READING: Decision time for manager Coppell
• Honour at last for the VC hero of India buried in a pauper's grave
• BLACKBURN v Manchester United: Roberts set to make it
• Play-offs chaos threat as Leeds case to reclaim 15 points looks set to drag on
• Builders face &pound;50m bid rigging fine
• Oops I did it again: Britney picks up a K-Fed lookalike
• BP: Rebellion spoils party
• Pound goes further on long-haul holidays
• Al Qaeda warns West: 'Your troops will bleed to death if they continue failed Iraq invasion'
• Quotes of the week: Benitez, Almunia, McDermott , Immelman, Calzaghe and more
• Newcastle v SUNDERLAND: Etuhu to miss derby clash
• 'I meant to swerve it,' insists Nakamura of his best Celtic goal and his first strike against Rangers
• MIDDLESBROUGH v Bolton: Southgate hit by O'Neil blow
• BP bonuses fuel investor revolt
• What the back pages say - April 18
• It's a long way from Malawi for David Banda as he dines at ritzy restaurant with mum Madonna
• Wigan v TOTTENHAM: Spurs likely to be without Chimbonda
• Ballack, Essien and Lampard could all miss Chelsea's Champions League semi-final showdown with Liverpool
• Ireland gives migrants the vote - but demands they learn English to avoid Britain's 'mistake'
• Arsenal v READING: Decision time for Coppell
• &pound;1.5m bonuses fuel BP investor revolt
• ARSENAL v Reading: Gunners keeper Almunia to miss Royals clash
• BLACKBURN v Manchester United: Roberts ready for United showdown
• Some Special advice for winning the Anfield war Mr Hicks, get Mourinho
• TOM HICKS listen up, bring Jose to Liverpool and all will be forgiven <br />TOTTENHAM mugs better get used to life without Dimi, Berba's off to a club with ambition <br />AND Manchester United waste £50,000 a week on Wes Brown - why?
• Pope to address UN after celebrating mass with 45,000 in packed baseball stadium
• Where did you learn THAT, Cruz Beckham?
• Minister withdraws threat to resign after Brown talks her out of it
• The &pound;1m con to buy the Ritz
• Sexy schoolgirl Geri Halliwell gets top marks for hilarity with her Friday Night Project
• Ireland gives migrants the vote - but demands they learn English to avoid Britain's 'mistake'
• The Old Firm charge sheets: Weir, Cuellar, McManus, Celtic and more
• Fly long-haul for the best value on holiday
• Muslim convert, 19, held under Terror Act as police explode 'bomb factory'
• St Mirren close door on an extension to the season for Rangers after players book holiday to millionaires' playground
• Hammer blow: McCulloch misses title run-in for Rangers and so might keeper McGregor
• Police carry out third controlled explosion at 'bomb factory' as Muslim convert, 19, is held under Terror Act
• End of the road for rogue salesmen
• Two-thirds of British residents fear violence as migrant tensions rise
• RBS gets a rights issue boost but rivals fall
• Revealed: the real rate of inflation
• One in ten faces negative equity
• Move over Banksy - meet the new graffiti artist whose stunning murals are transforming drab buildings
• 2,300 jobs go in City crunch
• Fears of violence as arms cargo bound for Zimbabwe will be transported through South Africa
• 'Superheads' to be rewarded with £200,000 for taking over failing schools
• Weekly migraines 'triples risk of stroke in women'
• Royal Bank of Scotland expected to ask shareholders for £12bn as 2,300 jobs go in City crunch
• April 18 - Essien gives Chelsea a glimmer of hope
• It's long way from Malawi for David Banda as he dines at ritzy San Lorenzo with mum Madonna
• April 18 - Matthew Upson, Danny Guthrie. . .
• Another blow for Brown as THREE more Labour MPs threaten to quit over 10p tax rate
• Teenager high on cannabis stabs girlfriend 32 times during bondage game after being told she had Aids
• Where did you learn to give the finger, Cruz Beckham?
• April 18 - Austrian racing driver Jochen Rindt was born
• Not grrrreat: After 50 years, anti-obesity Bill could ban Tony the tiger from TV
• Veteran Labour MP Gwyneth Dunwoody dies aged 77
• Oliver's not such a poor boy now...
• Market report: Friday close
• Yesterday’s trading: Wimpey brings the house down
• What a Happy-Go-Lucky break for Alexis Zegerman
• Elena Roger takes flight as the Little Sparrow
• From talk of the town to a campaigner's tough tale
• Mugabe orders partial recount as boat containing regime's 77 tonnes of Chinese arms is marooned off South African coast
• Grammar heads offered £200,000 a year to run failing comprehensives
• Royal Bank of Scotland to reveal £4bn losses as result of credit crunch
• Fly long-haul for the best value on holiday as pound falls against the euro
• Origin of the spouses: The private papers that reveal Darwin's inner turmoil over whether or not to marry
• Half a million diabetics 'depressed' from taking needless blood sugar tests
• Veteran Labour MP Gwyneth Dunwoody dies at 77
• Boy missed year at school after council thought parents lied about their address