I’m at that age where everyone’s getting married — even my husband and I tied the knot last fall. And just last weekend, I had the absolute honour of being part of my bestie's wedding — which was one of the most magical days of my life, but NGL, there was also DRAMA! If you’ve ever been in or planned a wedding, you already know: There’s always drama. Whether it’s family, the wedding party, the venue, exes, or friends...if you’ve been in a wedding, you’ve got stories.
After a weekend of putting out fires (and wiping happy tears, of course), I dove headfirst into the wedding drama trenches of Reddit to feel a little less alone in the wedding chaos. And let me tell you, even in the archives, there were too many juicy stories not to share. So grab your cocktail dresses and prep those speeches — it’s about to get real matrimonious in here...
1. "My husband and I are not religious — or at least not in any way that counts — so in one part of our ceremony, the non-denominational marriage officiant mentioned, 'We are not brought here today by faith but purely out of the love these two have for each other.' I guess it caught my husband's aunt and uncle off guard. Once the vows were exchanged, they began walking away as the ceremony came to a close. We managed to catch them by the time they got to the car to ask if everything was alright. Then, they lost it. His aunt started screaming about how disgusting we were and how our wedding ceremony was a disgrace to God. She said that if she knew we didn't have faith, she never would have wanted to be a part of something so sinful. We now find it funny...especially because they showed up without an invitation."
2. "I attended a wedding in 2011, which is when Hurricane Irene touched down on the East Coast. We arrived at the wedding, and the tent was getting beaten by torrential rain. We could barely hear the ceremony with the thunder, lightning, and heavy rain. Even the lights were flickering the whole time. During the reception, we noticed many empty seats and tables due to people who were unable to attend because of the weather. In the middle of dinner, the electricity went out. The bride and groom had to call it, and we all went home early. A one-hour drive took six hours with the flooded streets, fallen power lines, and detours. I felt so bad for the couple...it was truly horrible. Sadly, they got divorced a year later."
3. "At my cousin's wedding, several of the guys brought their dogs to the outdoor venue. Classy, right? As the evening wore on, several of the guys, including the groom, disappeared. They were found, drinking and dog-fighting. My cousin screamed at her new husband and started crying. The drunk good ol' boys laughed at her, so she got so offended that she left her own wedding."
4. "You know that line about anyone who thinks the couple shouldn’t get married, come forward? Well, at my sister-in-law’s wedding, the pastor, who is also her uncle, kept asking the question. He did it four times. He kept saying, Anyone? Anyone? It was incredibly awkward."
5. "The middle-aged bride's pregnant daughter's (23-year-old) boyfriend got trashed and put the moves on the bride's fifty-something sister. It was not subtle."
6. "I was in my sister-in-law's wedding a few years ago. She asked her uncle to walk her down the aisle because, at the time, she wasn't on good terms with her stepdad. Later, things got better with her stepdad, and she asked him to walk her down, without informing the uncle about the change. When the uncle found out, the uncle's wife and mother-in-law got into a huge fight about who should walk the bride down the aisle and told the bride to choose herself and communicate it with the stepdad and uncle. The bride said that they could figure it out on their own. They all got into a big fight at the rehearsal, and the uncle and his wife decided not to even attend the wedding the next day. Five years later, no one has apologized."
7. "During the reception, the best man said in his toast, 'Tonight, Tam is gonna find out why they call him Big Rick.' It was awful."
8. "Last year, one of my best friends got married. The best man is an absolute narcissist. He made everything about him and his wife. His wife wore white to the wedding, and his speech was...and I quote, 'Congrats to the bride and groom, you two will make wonderful parents.' THE GROOM IS STERILE! And the best man was well aware of it. My friends had to field pregnancy questions for the rest of the night. During the party, the best man told the husband that he'd better put a leash on his bi**h before she gets out of hand. Not surprisingly, the groom and the best man have barely spoken since, and the best man has been telling everyone that once he got married, the groom chose his own wife over a lifelong friend. Big eye roll."
9. "The groom got blackout drunk halfway through the dinner and disappeared. The bride gave a brief speech and disappeared to tend to him. After a while, we weren't sure if that was the end, so we all left a little bit after dinner. A very anticlimactic ending."
10. "The bride and groom bought too many tables, so the venue looked empty, even with all the guests inside. There was a lot of gossip and speculation the whole night about why people didn’t come. Later, when the mom brought out the cake to be cut, the bride realized the mother had ordered a size too big — making it seem like a confirmation that a whole bunch of guests didn't attend — and she completely freaked out on her mother."
11. "The caterer accidentally set the kitchen on fire, and the venue had to be evacuated. The fire department was called, inspected the scene, and extinguished the fire, but everything was behind after that."
—ejly
12. "I was at a wedding a couple of years ago where the groom's father had a stroke a few minutes after he made a speech. It was horrible for everyone involved."
13. "They had an exotic dancer perform at their wedding."
14. "At my best friend's wedding, her dad was so nervous about giving her away that he wrote his two lines on his hand as a cheat sheet in case he forgot the lines. He got nervous at the altar and had to look at his hand, but realized he couldn't read his handwriting. So my friend, the bride, had to feed him the lines. So basically, she gave herself away at her own wedding."
15. "When we got to our reception venue, we found that it was CLOSED. Supposedly, they had a major problem with the kitchen. Despite knowing our cell phone numbers, they called my mother-in-law's LANDLINE during the wedding. Because obviously someone was going to be there to answer it."
16. "When I was little, I was a junior bridesmaid at my aunt's wedding. It was a very long ceremony, and the ring bearer ended up locking his knees while standing and passed out from lack of blood flow. It was very wild."
17. "Someone revealed to my cousin's very religious in-laws at her wedding that she was pregnant, and that's why she and my brother-in-law had been so enthusiastic about getting married quickly. Her mother-in-law fainted and needed a fan to wake her up."
18. "Someone dropped suddenly on the dance floor and died in the bride’s arms."
19. "At my sister-in-law's Catholic wedding, the priest went on a long rant against gay marriage. Both the best man and the best woman were gay. It was horrible!"
20. "The night before the wedding, the groom had his bachelor party and got way too drunk. He somehow ended up knocking out his front tooth and needed emergency dental surgery that night."
21. "Absolutely NO ONE — and I mean, no one — showed up for the groom."
22. "Long story short, a bridesmaid cut me in the processional line to be closer to the bride."
23. "When I was a kid and at my godmother's wedding, I stood on her dress during the reception, and it ripped. She was so mad at me. I remember her trying to sew it back together in the bathroom."
24. "My dad got remarried recently. The wedding was outside, in a field across from his house. My aunt, who is always running late, came barreling up the field towards the tent where the ceremony was supposed to start in one minute. She caught her foot in some uneven ground and went down like a ton of bricks. We realized her foot wasn't on the right way anymore, so an ambulance was called. She ended up with a tib-fib fracture, total dislocation, and some new metal parts to keep it all together."
25. "At my wedding, my brother-in-law hit on one of my married friends, got drunk, puked on the dance floor, and then fell asleep in a bush."
26. "The girlfriend of one of the groomsmen got EXTREMELY drunk and was wearing a very, very short dress. I'm pretty sure everyone at this wedding saw her bottom over a hundred times. Then, she puked on the dance floor and had to be carried away by several people in the wedding party, kicking and screaming."
27. "At my cousin's wedding, he forgot the ring and used a gum wrapper or something equally silly."
28. "A grown man followed me and my cousin around, asking us — as pre-teens, I must add — if we were interested in dating his nephew, who was following him around and standing behind him."
29. "My purse was stolen during the reception by a random passerby."
30. "I got food poisoning at my own wedding and had to leave early and puked the whole night, ruined my dress, and was sick for two days after."
What about you? Do any of these stories bring back memories of chaotic weddings you’ve been part of — whether as a guest, in the wedding party, or even as the couple? Drop your best (well...worst) chaotic stories in the comments or the anonymous form below.
As for me...my own tales are still a little too fresh to share. I’ll need a few years, so for now, the floor is yours. Flood the comments — I need to share them with my bestie to make her feel better about the chaos that ensued last weekend.
