Tis the week before Christmas and all through the Pub,
There will be Christmas themed drinkies and much Yuletide grub.
Do I have to pay? Any special discounts for senior Pub Management colleagues, like me? If not, why not?
Morning Eddy, you will get your tea when I am good and ready and yes, you have to pay for everything you consume in the Pub because you are a customer!
Good morning to all snowpeeps, elves, reindeer and grinches!
*Opens pub.*
Tis the week before Christmas and all through the Pub,
There will be Christmas themed drinkies and much Yuletide grub.
The stockings were hung by the pub bar with care,
In hopes that St. Twassington soon would be there.
These elves. Isn't the National Elf Service on strike?
Sadly for all the children in England, yes!! Other nations elves are petitioning Santa as we speak, they want more chocolate money or they'll down tools as well. Think of all those toys as yet unmade, unpainted, un-cobbled together!
CHRISTMAS THREAT CONFIRMED
The Grinchaggis has awoken, and presents are at risk.
Wildlife officials, alongside a growing number of confused parents, have issued a seasonal warning following confirmed sightings of the Grinchaggis, a rare, green furred subspecies of Highland haggis with a deep rooted hatred of Christmas.
The Grinchaggis is believed to spend most of the year living high in remote Highland glens, avoiding human contact, festive music, and anything involving tinsel. However, as Christmas Day approaches, experts say increased levels of cheer, decoration, and public merriment trigger its annual descent into anger.
Under the cover of darkness, the Grinchaggis descends into villages, towns and cities, dragging a suspiciously large sack and attempting to steal children’s presents, decorations, stockings, and any loose items that appear festive in nature.
Despite its best efforts, the Grinchaggis has never successfully cancelled Christmas in Scotland.
Reports suggest the Grinchaggis often returns to the hills by Christmas morning, burdened not with stolen goods, but with additional gifts of whisky and teacakes, forced upon it by overly generous local households.
Experts claim this sudden exposure to generosity causes a noticeable change in the Grinchaggis, with its heart reportedly growing several sizes larger by the end of the day.
Authorities advise the public to remain calm, secure presents where possible, and remember that Christmas has survived far worse, adding that "It usually returns everything by boxing day anyway.'
Comments
*Opens pub.*
Tis the week before Christmas and all through the Pub,
There will be Christmas themed drinkies and much Yuletide grub.
A bright and breezy morning, some sunshine, a little cooler but far from freezing. Have a lovely day.
My tea please, followed by another tea, hurry up.
Do I have to pay? Any special discounts for senior Pub Management colleagues, like me? If not, why not?
Morning Eddy, you will get your tea when I am good and ready and yes, you have to pay for everything you consume in the Pub because you are a customer!
The stockings were hung by the pub bar with care,
In hopes that St. Twassington soon would be there.
These elves. Isn't the National Elf Service on strike?
Don't have volunteering today. Hopefully I'll go more weeks in the New year
Sadly for all the children in England, yes!! Other nations elves are petitioning Santa as we speak, they want more chocolate money or they'll down tools as well. Think of all those toys as yet unmade, unpainted, un-cobbled together!
CHRISTMAS THREAT CONFIRMED
The Grinchaggis has awoken, and presents are at risk.
Wildlife officials, alongside a growing number of confused parents, have issued a seasonal warning following confirmed sightings of the Grinchaggis, a rare, green furred subspecies of Highland haggis with a deep rooted hatred of Christmas.
The Grinchaggis is believed to spend most of the year living high in remote Highland glens, avoiding human contact, festive music, and anything involving tinsel. However, as Christmas Day approaches, experts say increased levels of cheer, decoration, and public merriment trigger its annual descent into anger.
Under the cover of darkness, the Grinchaggis descends into villages, towns and cities, dragging a suspiciously large sack and attempting to steal children’s presents, decorations, stockings, and any loose items that appear festive in nature.
Despite its best efforts, the Grinchaggis has never successfully cancelled Christmas in Scotland.
Reports suggest the Grinchaggis often returns to the hills by Christmas morning, burdened not with stolen goods, but with additional gifts of whisky and teacakes, forced upon it by overly generous local households.
Experts claim this sudden exposure to generosity causes a noticeable change in the Grinchaggis, with its heart reportedly growing several sizes larger by the end of the day.
Authorities advise the public to remain calm, secure presents where possible, and remember that Christmas has survived far worse, adding that "It usually returns everything by boxing day anyway.'
Have a good time volunteering
*Nicks all food and drink for, self, Eddy, Gorbals and Parton*
I haven't even prepared it, yet alone put it out!
Afternoon chinbob. What the hell are those... I mean, what's in the clatters?
Mincemeat and pilchard pies with a spam jus..............................